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When I grow up…..

I can’t even begin to imagine how many times I uttered the phrase as a child.  I wanted to be a nurse, then a teacher, then a mom, then a nurse, then a lawyer, then a teacher.  We made so many plans about what we would do when we were all grown up and had it all figured out.  Now that I’m 29 (several times over) I sometimes think to myself, “When I grow up….”

Well, I am technically a grown up.  I’m married, have 5 children, and I have a doctorate degree.  And, yet, it still seems like I haven’t quite figured it all out.  It seems like life would be so much easier if we could go back to that simpler time when someone else was in charge and we had a million dreams for the future.

Sometimes, I think that I just think too much.  Really, what needs to be figured out?

We don’t need all the answers to the universe.  There isn’t a magical amount of problems to solve or questions to answer.  We just need to live each day, doing our best.  Shuffling kids around, going to work, cleaning the house, whatever it is that makes our world turn.

I’m 100% certain that every single person experiences moments of self-doubt, but those moments pass.  They don’t define us.  There isn’t a magical moment in time when we are officially “grown-up.”  We continue to grow and change.  Each new experience leaves a mark on us and has the power to shift our perspective.  So, even though I’m 29, I hope that I won’t grow up for a long time.

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